Infantry VS The Machines
by I Am Darkrai
Summary: A collection of numerous stories of infantry unit classes try to take on far superior adversary's. Based on Star Wars Battlefront II.
1. The AT - AT

**Hi guys. These are just a short list of stories that track normal classes trying to fight regular vehicles. Based off of Star Wars Battlefront II. Hope you enjoy!**

"What is that?" The massive metal monster stood a little ways away from them, lumbering slowly along the battlefield. It was massive, obliterating any Rebel fortifications that stood in the behemoths path.

"I have no idea. How are we supposed to stop that thing?" The two Rebel soldiers stood side by side, shifting there weight that was pushed down on them from their heavy packs. They stared up at the giant metal thing, trying to devise a way to take it down. So far, nothing had come to them. So, they did what they do all the time. What they were programmed to do.

"Wanna go shoot it?"

"Sure. What else can we do?"

So the two infantry class units dashed across the battlefield, dodging blaster fire and thermal detonators alike. They finally got close enough to see the thing in detail. It really was huge, and the armor looked EXTREAMLY thick. But they were infantry classes - what do they care?

"Well, let's see. What can we do now?"

"Let's shoot it."

"Sure."

They let loose a barrage of blaster fire aimed at the belly of the monster, quickly emptying their blasters of their remaining ammunition.

"Well, that didn't work."

"Nope."

"Now what are we supposed to do?"

"I don't know. I'm not the smart one. You are."

"Thermal detonators?"

"Sure. Sounds fun."

So they chucked thermal detonator after thermal detonator, each exploding against the stomach of the metal monster. Again, not even a dent was made.

"Well, that didn't work."

"Nope."

"What do we do now?"

"I don't know. What do you think we can do?"

"OH OH, I KNOW!"

"What?"

"Let's just stand here, and stare it to death."

"Sure it will succumb to our almighty staring powers. You idiot."

"What? You asked?"

"Let's use our pistols. That will DEFINITELY work."

"Sure."

So they blasted the bottom of the metal destroyer with their tiny plasma pistols until they overheated. They stood there, scratching their heads, looking at each other.

"Wow. Um..."

"Yeah, that thing is way overpowered."

"Yeah, ummmm...now what?"

"I don't - "

The soldier was cut off as he was hit in the back with a beam of red blaster fire. He fell to the ground.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Moments later, the remaining unit was struck with a barrage of blaster fire as well, falling next to his friend. And no one noticed they were gone, and the AT AT kept lumbering on.

**Believe me, this has happened to me many times before. I don't feel like going all the way back to the base to change classes, so I just stand there and shoot at the thing, and then eventually an Empire AI comes along, and I die because all of my weapons were wasted on the AT AT. **

**Ita quite amusing, actually. **

**Make sure to leave reviews - they inspire me to right!**


	2. The Spider Droid

**More Infantry class bloopers, coming your way! Ever hate it when you are running along, just minding your own business, blasting away at enemy units, and then some SUPER overpowered ship comes and ends it all in the blink of an eye?**

**I HATE THAT MORE THEN ANYTHNG ELSE IN THE GAME.**

**Those ships are just WAY overpowered.**

The Clone Trooper quickly sprinted to an outcropping of rocks across the battlefield. He narrowly dodged blaster fire from the pesky droids that were scattered over the battlefront. His 3 comrades followed him, all infantry class as well. They stopped only when they were able to duck behind the cover of a few jagged rocks.

One of the Clone Troopers squad - mates pointed up at something behind him.

"What in the Republics name is that?"

All of the troopers spun around to see a giant spider - looking droid making its way across the battlefield. Its mechanical legs easily made its way across the rocky terrain, and it was decimating anything that was unfortunate enough to be in its way. It had 3 giant, glowing red optic sensors in the middle of its circular head.

"My god - it's a, it's a..."

Silence followed...

"Well, are you going to tell us what it is, or just stand there like a Wampa?"

"Well, I would tell you guys. The only problem is that I don't know _what_ that thing is. It looks dangerous though."

"Oh. That makes sense. It looks like a spider. and of course, all the scary looking machines are on the CIS team. Just out luck."

The commander needed to take the reins back before his squad was blown away by the blaster fire that was hitting the rocks. And there they were, just having a casual conversation, oblivious to what was happening around them.

"What are you guys just standing there for? Lets go shoot the living daylights out of that thing!"

He was greeted by a chorus of cheers. The squad dashed out towards that spider - looking machine, and opened fire at the walkers stomach. They were quickly depleted of all of their ammunition, and stood there baffled. What _was _this thing?

"Well, that didn't work."

"Any ideas on what we should do now?"

"I'm not the smart one, stop asking me..."

"GUYS GUYS I HAVE AN IDEA!"

"Just tell us already! We are sitting ducks out here!"

"THERMAL. DETONATORS."

"No duh. Alright men, you heard him. Lets blow this thing out of the water!"

To the troopers dismay, the explosions that the detonators caused didn't stop the spider machines progress at all. It stopped after a few moments, and swiveled on its giant ball-shaped body, aiming its huge cannons at the small squad of men.

"AHHHHH IT FOUND US AND NOW ITS MAD!"

"Scatter!"

It was already to late. The ground beneath the troopers feet was blown to smithereens, and the unit of troopers faded from the battlefield.

**I HATE THOSE OVERPOWERED VEHICLES BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO GO BACK AND CHANGE CLASSES, AND YOU GET SHOT ON THE WAY BACK, AND YOU DIE, AND...AGHHHHHH!**

**Anyway. Leave your reviews. I appreciate them!**

**PS. All of these short stories have happened to me, even the audio. Online play. Its hilarious. You should try it sometime.**


	3. The AT - TE

**I don't always play as the Rebels. I very - and I mean VERY - rarely play as either the CIS or the Empire. For some reason, I find as the empire, you have more of an organized feel. Even without the follow me command, they seem to group in bunches before moving out. Just a personal observation.**

**There are only one or two overpowered vehicles for the Republic or the Rebels - AND THEY ARE SUPER ANNOYING.**

The droid army was quickly overpowering the clones. A small squad of Super Battle Droids was making its way to capture their 3rd base of the game - and then victory would almost assuredly be theirs. They quickly took the base and took care of the pesky clones that were failing at guarding it.

"Ah, sir?"

The giant gray droid spun around to face the smaller yellow one that held a long laser rifle in his mechanical hands.

"What is it?"

"The only thing left to do before we are victorious in the name of the Sith is that thing."

He pointed a giant tank of some sort that was firing its lasers everywhere, destroying any squads that tried to come close to it.

"Yeah, that could be a problem..um..."

All of the smaller, yellowish droids looked up at their gray counterpart, waiting for some sort of order to move out.

"Well, what are we waiting for? It to shoot us? In the name of the Sith!"

The gray battle droid charged forward, its wrist raised, ready to fire its lasers at the much larger adversary.

Moments later, a large, black crater was left where the grey battle droid had been standing only moments before.

"Oh, that looks like it hurt..."

"Yeah..."

"Roger Roger!"

"THIS IS NOT THE MOVIE, WE NEED TO FIND A WAY TO TAKE THAT DOWN!"

So, they all charged blindly at it. Within moments, all of them were obliterated by the large, green beam of energy that struck them.

**THOSE THINGS ARE WAY TO OVERPOWERED.**

**Thats why I like the Republic. And the Rebels. They are the good guys. **

**Make sure to read and review!**


	4. Boarding Party

**It is hilarious. These stories are great. Because they are true.**

If there was sound in space, then you would all be deaf. The explosions across the starry sky lit up one after another, and laser fire threatened to hit everything. The Republic Gunship was hit heavily by the lasers, but trucked forward.

It came to a stop in the Empire ships hanger, and a small group of Rebels jumped onto the enemy ships floor. They were tight knit, firing upon anything that moved. They stopped right before the main entrance that branched off to many of the major functions for the ship.

"Alright guys. You know the drill. Get in, time bomb till your hearts content, and then get out. Clear?"

"Wait a second..."

"What now?"

"I have to go the bathroom..."

"WHY HADN'T YOU GONE BEFORE WE STARTED THE ONLINE SESSION?!"

"I did, but I've got a Big Gulp sitting here..."

"YOU IDIOT!"

The other to pilots muttered something along the lines of idiot and that he was just dragging us down.

"Just wait till the match is over. Simple as that."

"Fine. Let's just get in there already then. I REALLY have to go."

"Okay, we'll go in. Everybody ready?"

The marine was met with shouts of approval and agreement. They ran in, and the doors opened. They were met by a flurry of blaster fire from the machine guns mounted to the ships roof.

They all fell to the ground, fading from the games unit count.

**This has happened to me SO many times. **

**Oh, how I hate those roof mounted lasers. **


End file.
